Wednesday, 5 September 2018

The unspoken benefits of being a single pringle

*Quick disclaimer: This post is not sponsored by Pringles nor does it reflect their views.

Being single isn't an issue but somehow it presses itself as one and the more it presses, the more we seek to change our status.
Seeing the growing number of friends ambling away hand in hand, the #couplegoals highlighted on social media or the old couple sitting cosy in the cafe can influence an urgency in our hearts to get in on the happiness from a non-platonic relationship.

I used to have reservations about wholly embracing being single. Since I have been single for awhile and know how to have a good time either way.

Here are a couple of unspoken benefits of being a single pringle.

#1 You don't have to stress about farting in front of your girlfriend or boyfriend

We really shouldn't stress about this. Or the billion other things we stress over often when we like someone. Fortunately, being single as of now the only damage we can do is to a crush. Even then we save ourselves time since all of this is a right of passage of getting to know someone on a whole new level...

#2 You have a chance to open your emotional "baggage"

When I was around sixteen years of age, I didn't see how beautiful I was.
I couldn't wait to have a boyfriend, I wanted someone other than family or a friend to tell me I was beautiful.
I know now the young insecure me was seeking validation.
Since I was sixteen I have grown from seeking validation and have come to a great standing of self-acceptance and greater love of myself. When I see how my self-respect and self worth have also grown alongside I have no regrets about riding solo whilst growing as myself.

Everyone's situations and experiences are different. People have a host of internal warfare raging within them, histories of abuse and hurt their running away from.
If you don't open up your emotional "baggage".
You are likely to bring in that hurt and possibly inflict it on your relationship.

You don't have to have everything sorted before finally accepting that coffee date. However, you must open yourself to healing and growing. That hurt you experienced in the past may lead you to act or think differently when it comes to relationships or life. You may need to communicate this to those you love so they can learn to understand and aid you if that is what you need.

#3 Standards may improve

If your spending time single and you get to watch on the sidelines how other ships sail. You become the lighthouse keeper and a little more perceptive of relationship does and don'ts. You may learn from others experiences.

If your family and friends often ring you up for coffee, brunch or dinner Friday night. Then proceed to buy you the coffee, your drinks or dessert. This to anyone is a kind gesture, especially when nothing has been done to deserve it.
For single people, some view these gestures and realise how they were void from their last relationship or how this is what their worth and nothing less.
"She never called me or initiated dates!"
"He never saved a seat for me when we met with friends".

Are my standards higher now, the longer I have been single?
YES. I am an understanding person, but if my dear friends who is busy with work, university and their other relationships regularly will make the time to message me weekly or call at times. Or my dad who calls home every night despite working away.
If I take heed from this then I am not taking anything less or giving anyone less than such.

#4 One less commitment

This does sound awful reading out aloud.
However, many people, including myself, do not understand the time and effort that must be sown into relationships. Until such a time we are in a committed relationship and are faced with doing so.

Being single doesn't mean you have no commitments but you don't have to think about settling down or how your goal of working overseas may strain the relationship. You may think about how your parents may be devastated and you yourself as they will be so far away.
Yet, you are also aware that your travels could lead you anywhere and into the arms or heart of anyone.
Romance in the Swiss Alps anyone?

#5 You can still go on a lot of "dates"

My personal favourite. If your single and spending too much time on your own, the need to be showered with TLC and spend some quality time with others is often real and felt.
Because you have not limited yourself to one person to share the good times with, you open your time and lunch to friends, family, uni mates and work colleagues.

I myself have been on many "dates". These were dear adventures or intimate catch-ups with friends. And often there are the fancy "dates" where you dress up more than the usual and let your hair loose for the night.
I value these as they really have improved my standards.

#6 You get time to figure out you and pave your own path

There are some people who need the time to just do themselves. You get to figure out your identity, enjoy exploring it and exploring the opportunities in your career and culture. And for us who don't know what we are doing in life.
You can truly embrace not planning every other choice in your life around someone else. The choices you make are for your life. There is a great freedom to question and take on all doors whilst searching for our purpose.

Hopefully, we deter ourselves from entering relationships confused and embarrassed over our identity. As we took the time to attain self-acceptance and develop or self-esteem.

Before you wish off your single days in haste. Embrace that life will keep moving whether you are single or not. Thus you can live well, single or not.
Don't pause life or wait to live until the day you have someone to call "bae".
Take time whilst your a single-pringle to still live the good life.

bear with  my single pringles xx

No comments

Post a Comment

Copyright © bearwithtazii. Blog Design by